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Imagine
how you'd feel if you never had an orgasm during sex. Think how frustrated and
upset you'd get. And even if she's not saying anything, it's no
different for your partner. Her frustration will show itself, sooner or later. She might look
somewhere else for sex with the orgasms she needs! |
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Do You Have Difficulty Reaching Orgasm?Many men and women have problems reaching orgasm during intercourse. We tend to think that men and women enjoy orgasm rates which reflect the difference in their sexual drive. (See this link for some information on how often men and women think about sex!) But the surprising thing is that when you analyse the data, although men may want sex more often than women, the frequency of orgasm is not so different: over 90% of women can reach orgasm via masturbation and almost all sexually active women will reach orgasm given enough foreplay (say twenty minutes). When you learn that around ten percent of men have a problem reaching orgasm and ejaculating during sex - the hidden problem known as delayed ejaculation - one begins to wonder if conventional sexual wisdom should be turned on its head. So, for the sake of the 10% of men who have delayed ejaculation, and who wish to learn how to reach orgasm during intercourse, we offer further information. Of course, you may wonder what the purpose of the female orgasm actually is - there's no real reason why women should have evolved an orgasm, as it's not needed for reproduction. But that's another issue altogether! If you're more interested in finding out about sexual positions, this may be the place you need to go: www.greatestloving.com - a source book of sexual ideas and techniques. Another great place to look for ideas about how best to make love is Different Sex Positions, which is in fact somewhat derivative from other well known sexual information sites on the internet, but has new and interesting pictures of the various ways you can enjoy making love with your partner. Yoni Massage Yoni is the Sanskrit word for the vagina and translates as "sacred space" or "Jade garden." In Tantra, the Yoni is seen as worthy of both love and respect. This is particularly important for men to understand. Before a Yoni Massage you, the man, must create a space for the woman in which she is able to relax, a place in which she can more readily enter a state of high sexual arousal and come to experience the maximum pleasure from her Yoni. You will experience the joy of giving pleasure without expectation of anything in return, and the thrill of seeing a special moment. The Yoni Massage is a great form of "safe sex" and can build trust and intimacy in a relationship. Some Tantric therapists use massage of the G spot to assist women to break through sexual blocks or accumulated trauma. But really, the Yoni massage is not just about achieving orgasm, welcome though that may be. The objective is simply to provide pleasure and massage the Yoni, so that both man and woman can relax, with no worry about achieving any particular sexual goal. Should orgasm occur it can be more expanded, intense and satisfying than normal. However, the giver should not expect anything in return, because as provider of pleasure, he wants his partner to enjoy the massage and to relax fully into her sensations. The Massage Have the woman lie on her back with pillows under her head. In this way she can look down at her genitals as well as see her partner. A pillow covered with a towel can be placed under her hips, with her legs spread apart and her knees slightly bent and supported by pillows or cushions. This means her genitals will be clearly exposed for the massage, with full access to the Yoni and other parts of her gorgeous body. Before you make contact with her body, share some deep, relaxed breathing. Both of you can breathe deeply, slowly and in a relaxed way during the entire process. The man will gently remind the woman to start breathing again if she stops or begins to take shallower breaths. Deep breathing is most important. Start by gently massaging her legs, abdomen, thighs, breasts, and belly so she relaxes and prepares for touch on her Yoni. Use high-quality oil or lubricant, pouring it initially on her pubic mound. Pour enough to drip along the outer lips and outside of her Yoni. Then start to gently massage her pubic mound and outer lips: do not rush. Take your time and enjoy giving the massage. Next, gently squeeze the outer labia between the thumb and index finger, and then slide up and down the whole length of each labia. You can also treat the inner labia to the same technique. But always take your time and try to look into each other's eyes as much as you can. The woman should tell the man if the pressure, speed, or amount of oil need to be changed. However, limit your conversation as you continue to focus on the pleasurable sensation, because too much talking will take you away from the almost spiritual aspect of what you are doing..... The Crown Jewel The clitoris is a very complex structure, up to four times more sensitive than the penis. The glans has around 8,000 sensory nerve endings, and so is hypersensitive - yet it has only one function: to provide pleasure. In a massage, stroke the clitoris shaft with circles, or gently squeeze the body or shaft through the skin between your thumb and index fingers. Do this as a massage rather than as masturbation: if she becomes very aroused encourage her to continue to relax and breathe. Then, slowly and with great sensitivity, insert your middle finger (from the right hand) into the Yoni. Start to gently explore and massage the inside of your partner's vagina with the pad of this finger. Always, always, take your time, make sure you are gentle, and explore up, down and sideways. As you move your finger, vary the depth of penetration, the speed of movement, and the pressure you apply. Always remember this massage is about sustaining, nurturing and relaxing your partner's Yoni. Keep your palm facing upwards, and use your middle finger to make a "come here" gesture, as it crooks backwards towards the palm. The spongy, slightly raised, soft area of tissue just under the location of the pubic bone and just behind the clitoris, is the G-spot or sacred spot. When touched, a woman may feel the need to urinate, experience some discomfort or sense pleasure: it all depends on how healed she is, and how much tension her Yoni is holding. As you vary the pressure, speed and way in which you move the pad of your finger, watch her responses: side to side, back and forth, and circles will all produce different sensations. You can also insert your fourth finger a well if you and she wish..... ....the majority of women should have no problem with this and will show their enjoyment of the increased stimulation which two fingers can provide....but always take your time and be very gentle. It's wonderful for her if you use the thumb of your right hand to stimulate her clitoris and the little finger of the same hand to stimulate her anus - perhaps even penetrating her if she wishes. You can use your other hand to caress her breasts, belly or clitoris. If you do choose to massage her clitoris with the right hand, the best way is often to move your thumb up and down motion while the rest of your hand remains gently pressing on her pubic mound. The dual stimulation of right and left hands (your left hand is massaging her Yoni at this stage) can provide immense pleasure for her. You'll want to continue massaging, with a variety of speed, pressure and movements, but always breathe deeply and look into each other's eyes. G spot massage often produces powerful emotions - anger, sadness, and so on, or indeed joy. Just keep breathing, be accepting - it's not about you: some women have been sexually abused and this is how they heal. A caring, accepting, non-judgmental partner is of immense value to her in this sexual healing. If she has an orgasm, ensure she continues to breath as you continue to massage her if she wishes it. Multiple orgasms may occur, and if you have the technique, you can make each more intense than the last. This is called "riding the wave." As you end the massage, remove your hands slowly, gently, and with respect. Let your partner relax and and enjoy the afterglow of this wonderful Yoni massage. For both of you, cuddling and holding can be very soothing and comforting. The Yoni Massage can greatly enrich your sex life and teach you a great deal about female sexuality. Contents. |
Feminine Images
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This
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